However, there is another element, besides just all the help and support and the thrill of the contest itself that is keeping me grinning from ear to ear. This is just one area in my life right now where God has recently been expanding my horizons. In a very real way, He is renewing my sense of possibility. Awakening my dream gene. Getting my hopes up, so to speak. That last expression - it's a curious one, isn't it? I have often warned my children not to get their hopes up.Told my friends that they should be realistic in their expectations. I've even been angry at myself for hoping to reach a goal that ended up, ultimately, being beyond my grasp. But, why? Why do I do this to myself?
In all of my years of knowing God, He has never been stingy. The earth is the Lord's, and all that it contains. He is our good father, and it is His delight to give us good gifts. He doesn't say that if we seek His Kingdom first, a few things, or even some things will be added to us, but all things that we as humans need and seek in righteousness. Don't get me wrong - I'm not preaching a prosperity doctrine whereby every person will have a mansion and a garage full of luxury cars. God promised salvation and eternal life through Christ, not 40 acres and a mule. But, I'm also saying that we should not limit our almighty father to the things that we have determined are sufficient for us. Rather, shouldn't we dream big things and submit them to Him with a willingness to receive whatever He chooses for us? Read that last sentence again. Are you sure that you're really willing to receive what He grants for your life - even if it is good things beyond your wildest imagination?
I live with a poverty mentality. I have already spent each paycheck in my mind before it even hits my account, and I worry over where we will get enough money to cover the gaps that I imagine will pop up. I horde half-broken and obsolete items because someday I might need them. And, even though I claim to be in the world but not of it, I sure find myself willingly conforming to the limited opportunities it affords me. Again - why do I do this to myself?
Granted, as a family we've been through some tough times financially, and carefulness in handling finances is wise. But, worry is not. No matter how hard things might have gotten, we've never gone hungry. There has always been enough money to cover our need, and it was never my fears that caused things to work out alright in the end. And, while I've occasionally found myself very, very grateful to have had just what I needed just when I needed it because of something I had saved back, most of my stockpile of the 'potentially useful' ends up just being a burden I carry instead of a blessing that sustains me. If Peter - who was fully in the world and subject to its natural laws - could live in the reality of finding the money to pay his taxes in a fish, why should I also not believe that my God is big enough to not only provide for my every need, but to also surprise and amaze me while doing so?
All too often I find myself with tunnel vision - going to work, paying bills, putting food on the table. These are good things, and were given to me by a gracious Father, and I thank Him for them daily. But, while I am aware of them being a miraculous provision from Him, maybe others around me are not. Maybe God wants my simple life and gratitude to be a testimony to His goodness. Or, maybe - just maybe - He wants to use my life to bring Him glory in a different way. Maybe he wants to do great things to and through and for me so that, through His actions and my acknowledgment of His actions, the world can be reminded that God is still big, and He still moves mightily, and He is still both willing and able.
If I do not win this blogging contest next month, I will still be grateful to God for His miracle provision of the steady jobs, warm home, and food on the table that He has already provided. If tomorrow God sees fit for my husband or myself to lose our jobs and for our family to be faced with real financial hardships like we have never known before, I will still be grateful to God for His miracle provision, which I know will always be what sustains us, no matter how hard things may get. However - today I am choosing to get my hopes up. To look up from my everyday miracles and be open to the God of hope and accept whatever else He might want to give to me - even miracles beyond what I've already received.
I will dream big dreams, and crawl up in my Daddy's lap to whisper those dreams in His ear. And, unlike the advice I have unwisely given to my children, my Father doesn't ever tell me not to get my hopes up. Instead, He smiles and shows me greater things than I could ever have imagined, and in doing so confirms my faith, expands my horizons, renews my sense of possibility, awakens my dream gene, and gets my hope in Him up in a new and fresh way. For, just as it would be wrong of me not to thank God for the provisions He's given up to this point, it would be wrong to be unwilling to accept more in order that He may be glorified. So, God - for your glory, bring it on!
You go Girl!
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